heart Archives - Jan Cline

It’s Where You Belong

You belong there. Pick up where you left off. Begin again. Start over. Get back to doing what you were doing when you quit doing what you were doing.

I hear these words so often in my head, and sometimes I blow them off as meaningless. I have done all the above so many times, what’s the use? You may have asked yourself the same thing a time or two.

But if my brain is continuing that driving drone, there must be a reason.

The reason, I’ve come to know, is that trying to deny your purpose in life, trying to avoid what you have been given to do, isn’t worth the struggle. Your brain, and most likely your heart, have figured it out. It’s your bruised ego that has yet to surrender.

I have no ego, you may say. Yeah, I used to say that a lot too. Yes you do, just as I do.

The reality of life is that we don’t like to fail, stumble, waver, be a fool, or sit at the bottom of the success ladder when it comes to our talents and gifts. It’s hard to keep plugging away, standing below those who are near the top rung of that ladder you love so much.

Our egos take many hits when we are striving to achieve a place in a field where there is so much competition. I have learned that the writing/publishing world is highly competitive and therefore has the potential to become my source of discouragement instead of my favorite place to be. I know in my head that comparing myself to others in the field is only going to hold me back. It’s the beckoning crook of my ego’s finger that gets me every time.

What’s the cure for this common disease?

How do you get back to where you belong?

Tell your ego to take a hike – a back seat to the truth. The truth is that if you keep going back to it, you are probably doing what you were designed to do. Can’t stop picking up that paint brush? Keep pulling out that computer to jot down a story idea? Is the five lines on that blank music paper still calling you? Putting up with some discomfort, discouragement, disillusionment, and fear is the price for being on the chosen list. I’d rather be chosen to be or do something than spend my life being or doing something I’m not supposed to do at all.

Time to get back to doing what you were doing when you stopped doing what you were designed to do.

Keep reaching,

Jan

The Power of the Pen

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When was the last time you received a hand-written letter or note in the mail?

Once in a while I get a thank you note or invitation. But I think for the most part the world is all about emails and texts. They don’t even teach or encourage cursive in schools anymore. How sad.

I miss the art of using pen and paper and I appreciate when someone takes the time to use them. I received a wonderful hand-written note the other day from an unexpected source. It meant more than any email or text could.

(Dear Mr & Mrs Cline, My name is Jane Ellen, an RN with WAMC. This past week I had the honor of serving your daughter, Laura. Know that she has a knowledgeable compassionate physician, and a loving nursing staff. She has been prayed for and will continue to be throughout her treatment.)

What a blessing it was to know this cancer care nurse took the time to do this for us as Laura’s parents.

Makes me want to go out and buy some stationery and see if my hand will be able to hold up for a whole letter!

I hope you will make a point to get out your address book and jot someone a line or two this week.

A more intimate encouragement is just a few words away with the power of the pen.

Keep reaching,

Jan

Pain…the good it can do

by Jan Cline 4 Comments

Been thinking a lot about pain the last few weeks. I recently finished a wonderful book by Jamie Ford titled Songs of Willow Frost. At the end of the book he said this:

“I was an aspiring writer, fumbling for years with this thing called fiction, but too often I had nothing of substance to write about. It was only after I’d collected enough scars that I found the expository canvas on which to paint my stories…”

Considering my recent, and ongoing, pain of my daughter’s cancer diagnosis, this quote hit home for me as a writer.

Some people seem to go through life with very little strife, or tragedy, or pain. I have had people in my life who appeared to have avoided a lot of the pain I have experienced. I often wondered why some are “spared” while some are apparently “doomed” to excruciating difficulties with health, family, finances, friends, or other things from the long list of earthly troubles.

It doesn’t really make sense in the short-sightedness of our humanity. It’s so easy to ask why, why me, and look to God and exclaim, can we not do this again?! But when we step back and see the bigger picture of life here and then eternity, it’s clear pain has less to do with selection than is does with direction.

Where do we direct our reaction to pain? Pull it inward? Lash out at others? Be angry at God? Or could we possibly turn it into good?

A good author will help the reader connect on a personal level, sometimes reaching deep into their hearts. It’s a good use of pain. As a fiction writer, I hope I will capture the essence of my character’s pain more clearly because of what I have gone through. I hope my readers will find solace, comfort, insight, inspiration, and encouragement in what I write. After all, I want to glean all those things when I read a book.

So we can be changed by our pain, and in turn change others – for the better.

Once we get over the sting of it all, and the gaping wounds begin to heal, we would miss the best part of the process if we neglected to use it for a higher purpose. My friend Mick Silva wrote this:

“With a little pain God brings relief. With a little darkness eventually he brings light. He ordains the contrasts of life to make it rich and meaningful.”

Relief is something we all long for, and I would imagine it comes more readily when we resist the urge to contain our pain in a jar to be taken out in doses when we have a need for pity, justification, or attention.

Are you able to see your pain as a tool of prosperity for someone else?

Keep reaching!

Jan

May 19, 2016

When Your Child Gets Cancer

by Jan Cline 8 Comments

April 27, 2016

The call no parent wants to get. The imaginings that every mother lives through. The question to God that always follows devastating news.

Those things filled my world last week.

Waiting a week for test results was hard for my daughter. She tends to hold things in. Like me. She worried about her own daughters, wondering what might happen in a worst-case scenario. Even though she is a strong woman, I knew she would have a hard time with news I felt in my gut would come.

So what now? More waiting for more test results, more questions, more asking why. Then the day will come when she must go under the surgeon’s knife, and her life will forever change.

No, not forever.

There is the praise. In the forever part of our lives, we will be perfect. No disease, no scars, no fears. This is the promise we dig into with our fingernails when we feel we’re losing our grip. I wish I could boil that truth down to an elixir we could inject into our veins – to make it part of our very being, so much a part that we don’t waver one centimeter to the left or to the right. So much a part that fear and doubt are unable to penetrate our faith and peace.

This is what I wish for my daughter now and always. This is what I wish for all mothers out there who have felt their stomach hit their feet, who have clutched their head in their hands as they cried. This is what I wish for me.

It’s bound to happen in this sickly world. Someone we love will get bad news, and their life will be in danger. But this is not our home. This is temporary insanity that evil created. We don’t live here really – it’s just where we are for a while. Nothing here on this earth defines us – especially not cancer. Not if we are His.

I have a brand new filter for looking at life’s troubles, large and small, and I hope I’m able to respond to another’s sorrows more appropriately in the future than I have in the past. I think we all tend to be disappointed when those we want a comforting and understanding response from aren’t able or willing to give it. I’ve discovered that expectations in that regard seem to grow when we’re hurting. It’s something I’ll have to settle in my mind when this chapter is closed.

I’ve already been changed by this turn of events. As I read on Facebook the complaints and disparaging of those who are having a bad day, or stressed by their new high-paying job, or bummed that it’s raining on their tropical vacation, I have to bite my “tongue”. I want to gently comment and tell them I would gladly trade sorrows with them. But at the same time, I must extend the grace I hope to receive when I slip into my blinders on bad days. It’s just life.

So, what now? I let my daughter take one day at a time, let her teach me as I hope I have taught her. She is a survivor, she will be a survivor. I will try to be what she needs in a parent. I will warn every young woman who thinks she is too young to get breast cancer to start doing self-exams. It’s how my daughter was diagnosed – she found it herself. This terrible disease is reaching women at a younger age than ever before.

It’s hard not to fear the worst. But we are blessed to have a God who is in control of everything, even if it’s just having a bad day.

Be grateful, compassionate, understanding, and keep reaching…

Jan

3 Reasons to Escape and 3 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t

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I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wished for a place to escape this often discouraging world. I’m a melancholy person and on the introverted side. If I watch the news too much, or pay too much attention to the sadness in life, I’m fighting the urge to hide.

A house high in the rocks where no one can reach me is appealing sometimes.

There are many things that push us to the point of feeling like we need to escape to a safer, happier place.

FEAR

A curse common to all of us. I recently had the first time experience of fearing someone was about to physically harm me. Deep down I knew this person probably wouldn’t hurt me, but fear had me looking around to find the door. Fear is a great motivator, but it’s crippling too.

COMPULSION

I’m a bit compulsive about some things. I have come to learn that there are some circumstances that I don’t need to escape from. But my compulsions tell me to come and go as I please, often without thinking. Giving in to whims can be fun, right?

PAIN

My feelings don’t get hurt easily, but there is a limit to the thickness of my skin. No one likes to experience pain, and it’s such a relief to escape it. We might do just about anything to get away from this feeling.

You might feel locked in, held for ransom by fate or even a loved one, feeling we need to make a way of escape. We don’t walk by feelings…do we?

Yes, we certainly do walk by our feelings, no matter how hard we try not to. Escape feels good. Click to tweet.

But there are some good reasons to stay put and work through our difficult circumstance.

BETTER OUTCOME

We can’t see the future – even the very near future. God can. By running away, we might miss the bigger picture – miss the blessing we were meant to have. This is when we need discernment. Ask for it and He will give it, even when you are in the midst of crisis.

STRENGTH OF CHARACTER

Ever stop to think the pressure you feel is meant to teach you, toughen you, or draw attention to what God is doing in you? Instead of seeking relief, let the fire cure you and make you a more solid vessel.

LOOK AROUND YOU

You might feel like running, but what about the brother you are leaving behind? Were you supposed to be there for that person? Are you supposed to stay and fight for their benefit? Before you grab your toys to go home, consider your fellow man.

I wrote a novel about a group of people in our country, U.S. citizens who wanted to escape their situation. You will be able to order it from this website or from Amazon by late March. I hope you will read it and learn about what some people did when there was no escape.