Sometimes there are hurdles you can’t jump over. Sometimes the cracked doors are not going to open all the way. And it’s a certainty that man’s plans will never trump God’s.

Facing failure is not usually an enjoyable experience. I’ve never met anyone who said, “I like this feeling of falling flat on my face.” I have known some who pick themselves up more quickly than others, or are able to use failure to a bigger advantage. But for the most part, failure is an enemy to us humans.

I’ve always been a risk taker. Having taken a leap into many ventures, there have been some colossal failures. I find that the older I get, the less likely I am to jump into the boiling pot of risk. I am a bit more leery of being scalded than I used to be. I find myself growing lazy at jumping those hurdles and spend more time wishing for a measure of success. Just being honest.

But I know that success is not in my ultimate control – at least in the way I personally define success for the venture of being an author. I can learn the craft, pour my heart and life onto the page, market myself into bankruptcy, and do all the social media I can find time for. But when even marginal success eludes me, I have to do what we all do in the face of what we consider failure. Fight or fly. Lie down or stand firm. Be discouraged or be diligent.

I don’t always make the right choice. Life has a way of stepping in front of you and holding out its arms – trying to block you from making any decision at all. But we wake up the next day and at some point decide to decide again.

I don’t like failure. So I must redefine success, or make up my mind that it doesn’t matter as much as I think it does. The best outcome will be when I can lean on the One who lights my path, knows the plans He has for me, and opens doors in His time. There are worse things than failure. Like never having tried at all.

So what do you do in the face of failure? Do you struggle to define success?

Keep reaching, she said to herself.

March 28, 2016

Do you want the truth or do you want a lie? Sometimes we don’t want to hear the whole truthful advice about something we are going to do anyway. If we’re driven, we’re driven.

We learn as we grow what drives us and if we should listen to that voice.

I listened to the voice I believed was right when I decided to Indie publish my first novel. Here are the ups and downs of that decision.

Up: I’m my own boss. I own it. I had/have total creative freedom with content and cover.

Down: I’m inexperienced at all the details I needed to know in order to do this right.

Up: I have not only accomplished a great thing by completing a novel, I added another accomplishment to my list by publishing it myself. It is a good feeling.

Down: I’m tired, I’m scared, I’m uncertain that it will sell, and I don’t have a publisher to call to solicit encouragement.

Up: I can schedule my writing/publishing aspirations at my own speed and intensity.

Down: I do better with concrete deadlines – ones that someone else imposes.

Up: I have learned more in 6 months than I thought I ever could.

I’ll not end with a down….

Should I do it again? Will I do it again? Probably. Here’s why.

I have given in to the doubt, the fears, the disappointments, and the realities of self-publishing. But the bottom line for me is I’m NOT in control. I am not the gatekeeper of my writing and publishing career, whether traditionally or independently published. God is.

What will I do in light of all my doubts and fears that my first book will never sell more than 100 copies? I will write another one.

Will I Indie publish the next one too, even if the first one fails? Unless I have a publisher knocking down my door, I will. Do I think my original voice was right? Yes. Not because of how I feel , but because of what I know.

It’s easy, my friends, to get paralyzed by facts and figures. It’s common for us to be swayed by them. I am in the “do you trust Me?” phase of this adventure. I must seek glory for Him, not myself.

God is asking me if I trust Him. The only way I know to answer is to keep going with the plan, His plan.

Looking ahead and not getting stuck in the “what if I was wrong” quicksand is my goal for the coming months.

How are you doing with your plan, whatever it is? Are you doubting, fearing, thinking you need to run home and hide under the bed? Don’t do it. Just do the next thing. Go forward and…

Keep reaching!

Jan

You’re a fiction writer, and you have a story tell. You’re not standing before the multitudes with a mic in your hand, imparting your setting, reciting dialogue, or displaying the emotion of your characters through body language.

You have to write it in words that will convey to your readers all those things I mentioned. And guess what? You have volumes, thousands upon thousands, of words at your disposal to use to accomplish your task.

So why is it so hard to awaken all the feelings you want your reader to experience?

You have to give someone, one of your characters, the power to use the words you write. They can make the reader feel sadness, joy, fear, hope, devastation, anger, and much more. They have the voice that is telling the story.

But how does a writer make this happen?

Let me ask you this – how well do you know your character? Have you just fashioned them like a clay figure, or have you breathed life into them? Do you know where they are coming from, or have you just told them what to do and say, neglecting to make the connection you need with them.

I have learned through this process of storytelling, that I must let my character have life, and I must know how he/she would react, feel, say, remember, or reach out. I have to know…what is the pain that drives him/her to be who he/she is?

I must be willing to let my character tell the story in their words, through their eyes.

Something I learned from Susan May Warren’s My Book Therapy teaching, is to make a list of questions and interview your character to get to the bottom of what drives her. Go back to their childhood if you need to, and ask questions that will bring out the truth about them.

For instance, in my current WIP, my character has some deep pain that she has glossed over, causing her to stifle the woman God wants her to be. Here is how a conversation with her might go:

Q. What is our favorite thing to do?

A. I love to paint. But I don’t do that anymore.

Q. Why don’t you?

A. My mother was a painter and my father didn’t like her spending so much time on it. I didn’t want to make him angry so I never told him I wanted to paint too.

Q. Does your mother still paint?

A. No. She died. It would have been a sin to go on painting against Father’s wishes.

Q. Why would he wish that?

A. I don’t know. He just wanted me to spend all my time with him after Mother died. I had to do what he wanted me to do. It’s what the Bible says. I wanted to paint so badly, but I had to obey him. He would get very angry when I disobeyed and read to me from the Bible. He sounded as if he was God.

Q. Why was it so important for you to do what he said, especially once you were old enough to make your own decisions?

A. He knew I was weak and would fall into trouble if I made my own decisions. I never could do anything right anyway. I loved me enough to keep me close and away from the world.

Q. Did he ever go overboard with his control?

A. Well, he only did it out of love, but one time he locked me in my room for days because I spoke to a young man on the street by the mailbox. But I deserved to be punished. And he was right. Later I made a huge mistake in my life and he threw me out of the house to be on my own. I was weak and stupid, just like he said. ###

Can you see how little by little I’m getting to the real person in my character? If I kept going, I would find out more about her.

You may think this is a silly exercise, but it starts to flow once you get started. Then you can begin to see life through her eyes, and relay that to your reader. They will feel her pain and joy because you know her so well, you can’t help but infuse your story with emotion from your character’s experience.

You must feel what your character feels. If you don’t feel it – your reader won’t either.

Keep reaching,

Jan

I’m one of those writers who love to edit, but I’m not compulsive about it. I don’t do a lot of editing while I write, but I do use a few tricks I’ve learned in my experience of novel writing. I do what’s comfortable for me, some may not fit you.

Tool #1 is my own awareness.

I start my writing session by reading at least the scene I last wrote – if not the last chapter. This gets me back in the grove, but it also gives me a chance to catch simple errors that I don’t need to worry about later. It also alerts my brain to repeated carelessness I might be falling into. Eventually, I hope to train my brain to catch mistakes as they happen. I know, sort of far-fetched.

Tool #2 is Word’s voice.

After I finish a good chunk of writing, say a couple chapters, or one long chapter, I use the Text to Speech feature in Word. This reads my manuscript back to me and I am amazed at how many errors or inconsistencies I hear during this process. Not all versions of Word have this, but I love it. I do this after the manuscript is done too. Even though the voice is a tiny bit mechanical, I still get so much out of hearing the story read to me. Go HERE to learn more about that feature. Note: Adobe also has a text to speech program, but it seemed rather complicated to find and use.

Tool #3 is FIND.

I use the “find” feature (in MS Word) to check whether I’ve gone back to my old habit of overused words. I search for but, always, had, really…you know the ones. This process I save for after I’ve finished the manuscript.

Tool #4 is a monitor.

I used to print out my manuscript and edit that way, but I found myself getting bored with flipping pages, and when I went to make corrections on the computer, the process was too tedious for me. It seemed repetitive and I was too easily distracted. So I just edit from my computer screen….but, I hook up my computer to a monitor screen that is bigger and doesn’t strain my eyes so much. It just looks different enough that I feel I have a new perspective of the writing.

Tool #5 is Word’s Navigation.

A friend showed me how to use the Navigation Pane in Word to track my Chapters and subheadings. Here is a picture of what it looks like in use:

I will do a short post about how I use the Navigation Pane soon. It can be as simple or as complicated as you want it to be. Guess which way I go?

So there are some editing tools I am comfortable with. I know the list of ideas could go on and on. We each have to find what works for us.

Are you a compulsive editor? Do you enjoy the process?

Keep reaching!

Jan

I have been guilty of trying to make the picture of my life look better than it is.

Why do we do that? Why do we cut out the unpleasant parts of our lives, the pain, the mistakes, and paste them in a place where no one will see?

I took the picture below in the hills high above Palm Springs. I thought the tree looked interesting, but was more drawn to the landscape beyond. The tree looks ugly compared to the view of the horizon. Some might say it distracts from the overall picture, ruining the lovely shot that attracts most people.

But the truth is, the tree is a genuine component of the whole picture. And our past pain is the same in the portrait of our life.

Sure, I could have moved a few steps and the tree would not have been in the mix. I could have fooled everyone into seeing only what I wanted them to see – beauty unmarred by the mark of the pain that helped form me.

But that wouldn’t be honest.

Not that we have to share all our pain and mistakes with the world. The world doesn’t care that much. It’s our own well being that suffers when we reject the things God has allowed in our lives, and use them only for our pity parties rather than use them to benefit someone else.

The naked, crooked trees in my life can be my tools if I let them. If I make peace with them instead of dangle them like a badge of prideful sacrifice.

Want to read more about this? Two wonderful friends have recently blogged and shared about it. See those posts HERE and HERE.

Have you cut and pasted your life’s picture? Do you tend to use your pain as trophies or tools? Have you made peace with your past hurts?

Keep reaching!!

Jan